


Gods and Notations

by AwatereJones



Category: Torchwood
Genre: Cheeky, Diary, F/F, Gen, Gods, M/M, One Shot, Snooping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-11
Updated: 2017-06-11
Packaged: 2018-11-12 18:52:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,722
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11167950
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AwatereJones/pseuds/AwatereJones
Summary: Jack finds Ianto's diary and decides to peek, finding he had assigned gods to the team members when bored. Some were dead on accurate but one or two were a surprise. This is just a bit of funny from my brain, not serious, not canon so if you don't agree with it please don't read. ONE-SHOT





	Gods and Notations

Jack knew he shouldn't, it was wrong but this was Jack after all. He really couldn't help but peek.

The diary had been sitting there winking at him like one of those Harry Potter style books, all coy and cheeky. The dark red leather binding even smelt like Ianto. He knew because he covertly sniffed to check. Then once it was turned to one side he saw that Ianto was ever the archivist. The diary had coloured tags on some pages to show their similar content. No shit, really.

Jack grinned as pink was shown to be little entries about him, them. That. Heh heh. Green were entries about aliens they had housed, feeding habits and such that no doubt would be added to the files. Yellow were to connect Flat Holm notes and then the purple were coffee. Yep. Purple passion for the coffee. Jack found that sweet. Jack spent time finding some of Gwen's notes and was surprised to find she was a bit more caustic in Ianto's view. The horrible blood red assigned to her deemed extra angry.

Then he came across one that interested him.

Plain white ones, skinny and not at all screaming like the others but Ianto had hand drawn a little symbol on them, each one different and Jack sat staring at them trying to work out where he had seen them before.

Finally he chose one at random and opened it, finding his own name on the top of the page.

[](https://postimg.org/image/ib8tbeinj/)

.

_Dear Diary_

_Jack was coming out of the shower today as I entered with his laundry._

_Diary, I must tell you that he is hung like a horse. I almost dropped my load and I don't mean the clothing. Gods, but he is handsome. I don't know why he does this to me, twists me inside like someone is about to scream BOMB or something. He smiled at me, those teeth so white and flashy like the rest of him and I shot out of there with a silly blustery blather. Gods, I must have sounded like I had some sort of embolism the way I blundered about._

_I find it ironic that he is hung so. This Adonis, the man who not only is no stranger to rebirth and that bloody greenhouse of his that Owen pretends he owns seems to perk up when he's around as well. Like he gives off some sort of radiation or something._

_But then, who am I to say such things._

_I worship him meself._

.

.

.

Jack sat looking at the page as he reread it several times, then looked again at the symbol as he finally recognized it.

The symbol was for Adonis.

He sat and considered then flicked though the little post-it tags to find another one, opening it with interest.

[](https://postimg.org/image/uee4yytpr/)

Owen?

.

_Dear Diary_

_I have no idea why my friend that I regularly teased about his time with the dead has become one. Owen is now officially deceased and he doesn't seem too pleased with it. I now wish I had never called him the Jackal on my phone._

_I don't usually second guess myself but this is definitely something I feel bad about but when I went to him and confessed this he found it hilarious. Apparently Anubis is known to him and he found the concept of being marked on my phone as the beast highly amusing._

_I was going to change it but now I won't. After all it does suit the little twat._

.

.

.

Jack sat back and contemplated this for a while. Anubis, the Egyptian God of the Dead was a Jackal. How apt, Owen resembling one with his sharp features and if he liked the idea then why not. Jack made a mental note that those two were closer than he thought.

The next one was a roman goddess, Minerva and Jack knew before he flicked to the entry who it was.

[](https://postimg.org/image/ptryk1a0f/)

.

_Dear Diary_

_Tosh continues to amaze and inspire while showing her intelligence by letting Owen think some of the work was his. I had forgotten about the Space Pig until Owen commented on it, she hardly ever speaks of her medical degrees but I know she scored higher in the medical exams than Owen._

_Today she showed me an algorithm she was working on that was so clever it took me several minutes to see the binary codes. So amazing. My little Owl certainly is a wonderful member of this dysfunctional family._

.

.

.

Jack smiled as he agreed, his little goddess was indeed a rare bird.

He checked if the coast was clear and searched for another, now completely riveted to this strange compulsion Ianto had to label his teammates. Ah!

[](https://postimg.org/image/48mvwfd9r/)

.

_Dear Diary_

_Went to Rhys' Stag Do with mixed emotions. Here he was inviting me when he barely knows me, like extending an olive branch and yet he is also Gwen's. Oh the urge to warn him, to scream 'run for your life' as he looks so sweet, innocent and bloody impressionable. A deer caught in the headlights._

_Gods, he can put it away. He almost drank me under the table and you know that's saying a lot. My bad old days as a yobo seemed to come back to me, this Hoodlum singing along with him to songs the others seemed to have forgotten. Philistines!_

_We are going hunting soon, he made me promise. Apparently he loves hunting and knows a lot of areas in the wilds where we can spend a day getting absolutely nothing while drinking enough to fell a rugby team. Herne would be proud._

.

.

.

Jack laughed softly as he saw the similarities, yes Herne the Hunter would have liked Rhys for a spokesperson.

Now he had to know, feeling cheeky as he searched for Gwen's and he was again surprised to find it with the picture of a haggard crow. Really?

Jack opened the page and after an internal fight, he read it.

[](https://postimg.org/image/v7vc5bp4f/)

.

_Dear Diary_

_She's done it again. Morrigan bloody strikes. All Me-Me-Me and all I could do was stand there as she swanned about. Owen is at least no longer under her spell but the bloody queen of bitchiness was definitely a witch in a precious life. Diary, my only dear friend. Is it bad that I imagined her burning at the stake and felt the better for it? I know, I am terrible._

_The sooner her and Rhys are married and off on their honeymoon the better, that bloody tiara is a bitch to polish, if ya know what I mean._

.

.

.

Jack sat for a long time with the diary in his hands, shocked at the anger there. Morrigan? Queen of phantoms, demons, shape-shifters. Shit. Ianto has the sight? How ironic that shape shifters became the wedding crashers. Also, the sex gas might have hinted at it too.

Jack found himself laughing softly at the Welshman's humour, dry yet so insightful.

He sat back and flicked some more, then found a medical symbol and canted his head. Hermes? Owen already had a god assigned so he opened to the page and was shocked to find a drawing of the Tardis along with a small photo of the Doctor grinning at the camera like he was looking at his best friend.

The only notation was small, Ianto's writing heavy as if angered.

[](https://postimg.org/image/8kg2z69kf/)

.

_Bloody thief and trickster pilfering my archives again. That man really gets around and has no idea about boundaries does he?_

.

.

.

Holy shit.

Jack laughed softly as he realised Ianto had the man pegged.

Jack leaned back and wondered if Ianto had one for himself, he must have. Was there a God of coffee? He flicked though and found very little else that resembled the gods but as he closed the book his fingers detected the embossing of the cover and he turned it in the light, finding a huge bird on the cover that could not be seen unless you turned to book a certain way.

Jack knew what it was and he was now transfixed as he stared at it.

Ianto must have purchased the book and had this done, done it himself or it was already there? Maybe this is what gave him the idea?

The Raven was powerful and its talons were outstretched as it seeking something and Jack turned the book over, opeing in it to the back page an finding Ianto had doodled the symbol he had looked everywhere for, the chill now spreading as he wondered when Ianto had recognised himself in the cover?

Apollo. God of light, truth and prophecy. Of course he was. Gods yes, music, poetry, arts, yeah.

Ianto was this god, so gentle, loving and mildly cheeky with his ability to cleave a man's heart with his bow and arrow, one arched eyebrow shooting straight to Jack's very soul.

Healing Jack with a gentle hug when thing go wrong.

As Jack sat there he felt a warmth start to spread as he saw his team as Ianto did.

He had always seen them like superheroes, you know the X-men or something but Ianto had pegged them. He had chosen well.

Jack placed the book back carefully and decided to go hunting for his sweetling, his little God.

Heaven but a kiss away.

[](https://postimg.org/image/t5uur2r5b/)

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 **Adonis Jack** \- Greek God of rebirth and vegetation, worshipped in mystery religions for untold eons A HORSE

 **Anubis** -  Owen Egyptian God of the Dead A JACKAL

 **Hermes** \- THE DOCTOR Greek God of boundaries and travellers, shepherds and cowherds, orators, writers and poets, invention, commerce, and thieves. Messenger of the Gods. Trickster God. A RAM

 **Herne** \- RHYS British God of vegetation, vine, and the wild hunt STAG

 **Minerva** \- TOSH (Roman) - Goddess of wisdom, medicine and crafts. Her name is linked to the Latin word mens which means "intellect," suggesting the intelligence and inventiveness of this ancient Goddess. OWL

 **Morrigan** (Celtic) -GWEN The terrifying crow Goddess associated with war and death on the battlefield. She was queen of phantoms, demons, shape-shifters and patroness of priestesses and Witches. Her name means "great queen" in the old Irish language. Morrigan was also known as Morgane, MorrÃgu, MorrÃghan, Mor-RÃoghain and MorrÃgna. CROW

 **Apollo -** Ianto - Greek/Roman young solar God, God of light, truth and prophecy, God of archery, medicine and healing, God of music, poetry, and the arts  A RAVEN


End file.
